Dating starter questions
Have you ever regretted not hooking up with someone you just met? Who and why would it have been a bad idea? Which kink of yours do you find most partners do not share? And which do you find most partners have in common with you? Have you ever stayed in a relationship just because of how good the sex was? Or are people capable of change? Have you ever gotten revenge on an ex? How so and how did it feel afterwards?
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Did you keep to yourself as a kid or did you have a lot of friends growing up? Out of all of your family members, who do you wish you were more like, and in what way? Do you like getting things done right away or checking off a to-do list gradually? If you had all the money in the world to do what you really wanted, how would you spend your time? What secret do you have that your co-workers would have a hard time believing is true?
Shahida is the author of Power: She is a staff writer at Thought Catalog. They respond to consequences. You deserve the best and more… so I strongly encourage you to get this book! It took every detail from my past struggles and validated and helped make sense of everything. Sign up for the Thought Catalog Weekly and get the best stories from the week to your inbox every Friday. You may unsubscribe at any time. By subscribing, you agree to the terms of our Privacy Statement. These conversation starters and topics will spark unique conversations for couples, for friends, or even as a way to get to know someone.
Do you prefer going out or staying in during your free time? Do you know your Myers-Briggs type? Does it seem accurate? Would you describe yourself as more of a loner or a social butterfly? What would you spend your ideal night in doing? What does your ideal night out look like? Would you describe yourself as more of an extrovert or introvert?
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What is one thing people always notice about you? Is there a faith or spiritual belief system you identify with most? If your friends described your worst habit, what would it be?
In your opinion, is it more important to be honest or to be kind? What would your loved ones say is your biggest flaw? What would your loved ones say is your biggest strength? Which situations do you find yourself becoming more introverted in? What is one situation that always brings out your extroverted side? What quality turns you off immediately when you first meet a person?
What quality makes you most excited when you first meet someone? What one activity do you always do alone that would surprise most people? Are you okay with being rejected? How do you deal with it? How would you describe your ideal date? Except it didn't feel like a third date So they naturally, mutually, without really discussing anything, just skipped all the are-we-really-into-each-other nonsense of those first unsteady weeks. She was able to leap-frog her bad habit of being attracted to guys who just weren't into her, and he was able to leap-frog the male version of this.
And, reader, she married him. We found a third example of this kind of "speed mating" in the Modern Love column of the Times this past week: During a first date with a guy she'd kind of known for a while, the author had one of those flirty-theoretical conversations about whether it was possible to fall in love with anyone. It's the kind of conversation that's possible to have on a first date, because you're basically strangers, but then you can't really talk about that stuff again until you're in a very serious relationship.
The author, Mandy Len Catron, recalled a scientific study she'd once read about, wherein a researcher put two complete strangers in a lab, had them ask each other a series of increasingly intimate questions -- thirty-six, in all -- and then had them stare into each other's eyes for four minutes. One of the couples in the study ended up marrying yes, the researcher scored an invite! Mandy and her date decided to replicate the experiment, except in a bar.
They found the list of questions online and passed an iPhone back and forth between them who said smart phones are killing romance?! Reader, they fell in love. Of course, this experiment isn't going to work with any random stranger you pluck out of your morning commute.
But on a first date, where chemistry and at least a little mutual interest has already been established, we like it a lot more than all of that crappy, heartbreaking game-playing. Plus, it's a great way to weed out selfish, one-track-minded pickup artists before you get in too deep. As the author says:. But what I like about this study is how it assumes that love is an action. It assumes that what matters to my partner matters to me because we have at least three things in common, because we have close relationships with our mothers, and because he let me look at him.
If you want to try it yourself, here are all 36 of Dr. You should take it in turns, each answering all 36 questions. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want? If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know? If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner.
Share a total of five items.
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How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people's?
If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you've just met. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone?
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Why haven't you told them yet? Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Share a personal problem and ask your partner's advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen. Set a timer on your iPhone, as the author of the piece did. After that, feel free to seal the deal with a kiss.